An Honest Proposal

He drove for about five hours to come see her that weekend. She was going away to their future home together-down in Louisville, Kentucky. She had to leave about five weeks before he was ready to go down there with her, so there would be a lot of time apart from one another. They loved each other very much, you see, and they dreaded having to spend so much time apart. It was only a few months ago that he had made his decision on what he was going to do. He knew that there was no doubt in his mind about how he felt about her. He was going to marry her one day. He also knew he wasn't going to let her move away before proposing.

He had thrown around a bunch of ideas in his head. Take her to all her favorite places in the city, and then pick one spot and propose there? A fair option, but timing was poor and an opportunity never presented itself. Perhaps he could set up an elaborate adventure, with grand designs, elaborate sets, and all other manner of over-the-topness. No, she had said she didn't want it to be like that. What, then? What was the best thing to do?

He thought long and hard about it, and then realized the answer was very simple. The best way to do it was to do it as simple and pure as possible. Take her somewhere where you could both be alone, drop down to one knee, and ask the question. Wham, bam, thank you ma'am.

But when and where remained the questions in his head. Time was running out, and the party and the shore house was fast approaching. That's when it hit him. The party would be perfect. A lot of their friends would be there to share in their happiness, and he would be able to take her someplace nice and quiet to ask her. The plan was set in stone. Now to get the ring.

She had once told him that she heard of a man who proposed using his old class ring from high school. It just so happened that he had found his old class ring from high school not so long ago. She had specifically said she wanted to buy her ring together with him, so they could get the best possible one.

The ring was chosen, the time and place were set. Now he played the silent waiting game.

When it finally happened, she was so overwhelmed with happiness and delight that she didn't hesitate to say yes. She cried tears of joy and accepted the ring from him, commending him on keeping a secret so well hidden. She was thrilled that their shared dream had  finally come true. All of their friends were ecstatic, hugs were shared, and loving words were exchanged. Her parents had given him their blessing, of course, and were very happy for the both of them.

That's the story of how I proposed. Perhaps it will be a good guide for everyone else out there :).

Gaslighting...Not As Good As Electric Lighting, I assure you.

Greetings Blogger! I'm moving my platform over from WordPress, and shall be sharing some of my previous posts here!

Today we are going to talk about gaslighting. For reference, gaslighting is a form of mental abuse where in which false information is presented with the intent of making a victim doubt his or her own memory, perception, or sanity. This could be something as simple as simple denial about committing a wrongdoing all the way to redirecting the blame to the accuser.

What does this mean in laymen's terms? Let's look at a quick example. Say you're a serial thief. You can't stop taking money from your friends and family. Whenever someone accuses you about your wrongdoings, you call them silly or crazy and claim that they must be imagining things. That person, in turn, doubts their ability to remember things, allowing you to more easily take money from him or her. Vicious cycle continues, and you walk away with a big fat paycheck.

So how does this all apply to a relationship? There could be a number of scenarios. Say you're a cheater and you continually step out on your partner. Your partner confronts you about it, and you tell your partner that he/she is imagining things. Now your partner will start doubting him/herself, and, if he/she isn't wise, will become vulnerable enough for you to continue to take advantage of him/her.
I can't number how many red flags this sends up. You're completely taking advantage of your partner, the person that should trust you the most and you, in turn, should trust the most. This also lends itself to emotional abuse, which in turn will dehumanize your partner and make him/her your punching rag for your terrible deeds.

Remember how a healthy relationship is built on trust? This is the anti-trust. Yeah, like the anti-Christ to the Christ, that kind of thing. If you're going to try and make your partner out to be a paranoid, unstable individual, you are submitting your partner to a form of abuse which makes you a very unsavory human being. Don't do it.

That's all I've got for today. Not much more needs to be said. Don't gaslight. It's abusive and wrong.
A note about the future-I will be starting another blog in concurrence with the start of my new novel. Keep an eye out for that!