Playing the Market...Be Careful Not To Crash

So you're fairly newly single and decide you want to play the market a bit. You'll date around a bit, going out with a different guy every now and again, trying to see what's out there for yourself. You like some of the people you date, but you don't see any reason to commit, nor do you think it's smart to stop dating around when it's so fun. You just keep going, because where's the harm in it all?

There's a lot of harm you're doing, both to yourself and to the others, when you try the dating around angle.

Dating around could be seen as a good way to meet other people and gauge your interest level in the dating market, but I don't think it's the best way to go about finding someone for yourself. It could build a bad reputation-people may talk about you behind your back, say you're afraid of commitment, or worse things. You could be painting this horrible image of yourself without realizing it.

Making it clear that you are only in the game to date and have fun is not a good enough excuse. It comes off as immature and loosey-goosey, something you should be avoiding when maturity is of utmost importance.

What do you do then? How do you shop around without leading yourself down a road of self-image destruction?

You can use online dating or social gatherings to meet new people and make friends. Get to know them a bit in these functions before you decide a date is proper. Get some phone numbers or emails, have some outside conversation, and build a strong foundation. It's fine to talk to many people and get to know them, as you haven't gone on a date proper at all.

Once you decide on going on a date with one person, give them a few shots. You can't really determine whether or not someone is for you in just one go. If you like him/her, go on a few more dates. See where things go. If you don't, no harm, you've built a strong base of candidates you can choose from and get to know a bit better.

Until you find yourself in a committed relationship, don't stop chatting with your other friends. At the same time, make sure you don't lead anyone on-make it clear that you're dating someone at the moment, and that you're seeing how things go with that person.

Dating around can lead to all sorts of drama you don't need in your life. Avoid it.